Why we all feel resistance to change

In the last week, there's been a topic popping up everywhere I look! In my meditation classes, mentoring sessions and all over Instagram. Now, I appreciate this is probably due to a phenomenon known as illusion frequency - once we become more aware of something, we tend to notice it more frequently (just like when you're considering buying a new car and all of a sudden you see them everywhere!)

Nonetheless, it feels like something that's very much in the collective consciousness at present. 

The topic is, feeling resistance to changing the status quo in our lives - even when the status quo has become really unenjoyable or even harmful for us.

Here's the thing about change - and why I promise it is not just you who feels resistance when considering changing a habit, a routine, a job or living situation.

Our nervous systems (the incredibly sophisticated system in the body that essentially governs the function of all other systems) are primed to seek familiarity. Another way of saying that: the nervous system craves what it knows. This is part of our evolutionary drive to stay alive.

For the nervous system, known = safe, unknown = potentially unsafe so let's avoid!

This is why we can intellectually understand that something is no longer working for us - be that the way we start our day, our caffeine intake, our go to meals, through to a relationship dynamic or a job - and yet SO much resistance comes up in the mind-body when we consider changing it. 

I want to repeat - the fact that you might feel resistant to stepping out of the comfort zone (even when the comfort zone is no longer what you want to experience) into the unknown, is how you are wired! This is our design. 

AND - this doesn't have to stop us from making the changes we know we are ready for.

So, how do we go about creating change, knowing that we are wired to seek familiarity?

Firstly, knowledge has organising power. We honour what we know about the nervous system. Rather than wronging or judging ourselves for feeling resistant to creating change, we simply acknowledge that this is a predictable response. 

Second, we support the nervous system. Knowing that change can be dysregulating, any time we are embarking on creating a change (no matter the scale of the change) it's incredibly helpful to double-down on your nervous system practices. Whether you meditate, you intentionally use the breath or movement, you ground in nature or work with a somatic practitioner - giving the nervous system the experience of rest and safety, while also acknowledging the resistance and allowing it to be there - sets you up for maximum ease as you move in the direction of the new. 

What's your experience with change - do you sail on through or notice resistance to moving out of the familiar known? I'd love to hear from you!

Caroline x

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